Bad friend’s influence

Negative peer pressure has been known to lead to suicide and suicide attempts. Teens who feel too pressured by their peers have chosen suicide as a way out.

Other teens have been so badly harassed by groups of teens (some of who would have been giving in to peer pressure while doing the harassing) that they felt suicide was the only way to end the struggle.

When negative peer pressure rears its ugly head, anything awful can and will happen. Even seemingly minor things like teasing can cause emotional scars that will last a lifetime. Peer pressure has led teens to be extremely cruel to other teens and when that happens the victim is often changed forever.

Peer pressure is a difficult thing to deal with and some teens have taken drastic measures.

Can peer pressure be caused by just one person or does it need to be a group?

It does not have to be pressure from a group to be considered peer pressure.

A boyfriend/girlfriend who pressures a steady to have sex is exerting peer pressure. This is probably one of the most common forms of peer pressure faced by older teens and young adults. It is important to know that this is peer pressure and that it has nothing to do with proving love or commitment.

A best friend who tries to get a pal to shoplift is exerting peer pressure. In fact, most teens report feeling peer pressure from individuals more often than from groups. The group dynamic only comes into play in so far as the teen being pressured worries about how the group will react if he/she refuses to conform to the wishes of the individual.

School matters

Peer pressure most definitely plays a role in bullying.

When a teen is generally perceived as weak, odd, or different by the majority of his/her peers he/she becomes a safe target for bullies.

If the general opinion of a person is negative a bully is less likely to be rejected or ostracized for picking on them. This is the role that peer pressure plays in bullying.

Bullies do not want to be disliked, in fact many kids bully out of a deep sense of insecurity and self loathing, and because of this they do not want to pick on people that will cause the majority of their peers to dislike them.

The bully picks an easy target, somebody that others are unlikely to defend or get upset over. The peer pressure to be liked combined with the peer pressure to reject the person who seems different leads to bullies picking on kids who are already struggling with their own social issues.

It is a sad and vicious fact that many bullies are very popular with their peers. These bullies have made their popularity contingent on their picking on an outcast peer and the pressure to keep up that image keeps the cycle alive and kicking. The only accepting to this are bullies who become bullies because they don't fit in. But as a general rule, most bullies are popular and liked by the majority of their peers - the peers that they leave alone.

Sadly, the more popular the bully the less likely adults are to call the behavior bullying. Popular teens often act "appropriately" toward teachers and around adults so they are not perceived as being naturally problematic. Teens who odd or vastly different tend to act this way around adults as well and this only compounds the problem.

The peer pressure to accept people who are well liked or well behaved around authority can even impact how adults behave.

Peer pressure can lead to school violence. As is well known with the Columbine incident, peer pressure can be a significant factor in school violence. There can be peer pressure in the form of pressure to go through with violence once a threat has been made. There can also be peer pressure in the sense that bullying (and related pressure) feed the anger and resentment that can lead to violence.

If you give in to peer pressure does this mean that you have no will of your own? No, it means you are human. Even adults have been known to fall victim to the force of peer pressure. It is the type of peer pressure that you succumb to, not the fact that you give in that matters. If you repeatedly find yourself doing things because of peer pressure that you later regret, if you are harming yourself or others, or if you feel bad about yourself for giving in, you should talk to somebody. Otherwise, know that even the strongest willed person can give in to peer pressure.

How to cope the problem

Can peer pressure be beaten? Yes and no. Some forms of peer pressure are subtle and hard to combat, other forms are positive and don't need to be eliminated, but when peer pressure is negative there are definite strategies that work to curtail its effects.

The best strategy to combat peer pressure is open and honest communication between teens and the adults in their lives.

If a teen feels that acting in a way that adults think is bad, and if they value the opinion those adults have of them, the pressure to keep the good opinion in tact will outweigh any peer pressure they may face.

Another key factor is self love; this does not mean conceit but rather a genuine liking of and respect for self. When we like ourselves, when we are very comfortable being ourselves, we won't easily be changed.

If you think about which type of people are most respected by peers you will find that they are confident, will stand up for themselves and others, and will appear to have a strong set of personal values. The very best way to beat peer pressure is to find value in things other than acceptance. Value yourself, be open and honest about what you believe in, where you stand on issues and what you feel and you will be less likely to succumb to negative peer pressures.

How about teachers? Depending on the relationship between students and teachers, a teacher can easily be perceived as part of the peer group. There are lots of situations that merit a more casual relationship between students and a teacher and when this happens it is very easy for teens to consider the teacher to be one of their own.

In this situation a teacher is often viewed as a leader and can exert peer pressure just like any other group leader. In this situation the advisor can model positive behaviors and it is good that he/she be looked up to by teens.

Another way teachers exert peer pressure is by counting on peer pressure to keep unruly kids in line. Everybody has had a teacher who has punished the entire class with detention when one or two people act out. This is another example of how teachers may use peer pressure. Remember that not all peer pressure is bad.